Don’t Waste Your Femininity

It was during our New Testament Survey that while my brother was discussing I Timothy chapter two when this blog topic was conceived.

God created women with the same purpose as men; that is, to glorify God (Isaiah 43:7). One of Elisabeth Elliot’s quotes that I love says, “The fact that I am a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but the fact that I am a Christian does make me a different kind of woman. For I have accepted God's idea of me and my whole life is an offering back to Him.” Thus, Christian women should not use our distinction from men to justify sins or idolatry. Using our being woman to reason out that we have greater needs and demands doesn’t glorify God. We may be even wasting the very purpose of our creation. Please bear reading this blog post and I pray that my meditations will help you not waste your femininity.

I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God. (I Timothy 2:9-10)

Don’t Waste Your Femininity on Flamboyant Clothes

Women are mostly given the taste for artistry and creativity; that is to be used for conducive homemaking. It can also be used for one’s physical outlook. Nonetheless, artistry and creativity doesn’t require the compromise of immodest dress. You don’t invite attraction and appreciation with low cutlines, miniskirts or even short shorts; rather, you provoke lust.

Christian women, know the struggles of men regarding lust and you will be helping them a lot by not enticing them to fall or even struggle with it. You are created not only to complement your partner/future partner. You can do so even among your brothers in faith. You can glorify God even with the choice of clothes you wear. (read more here)

"In the world's philosophy people dress in order for other people to notice them. But the Christian philosophy is that we do not dress primarily for others, but to please God. If He is the one we're trying to please, our objective should be a desire to reflect his glory, even in the way we dress.

In the world's philosophy the purpose of clothing is to reveal the body. The purpose is for sexual attraction. Some do it overtly and crassly-exposing most of their bodies. Many of the women in our churches would not do that. But some have adopted the philosophy of showing a little bit to tease. That can be just as seductive, if not more so, to Christian men than some of the more extreme forms of immodesty on the covers of magazines at the grocery store check-out. The Christian understands that the purpose of clothing is to cover the body." (Nancy Leigh DeMoss)

Don’t Waste Your Femininity on Material Temporal Things

Women are so much hooked now on how they may improve their hairs, how to have fairer skin, how to loss weight – all for the physical yet temporal beauty. Paul reminds Timothy that women are not to be much with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes. It is not bad to braid our hairs or use accessories but Paul rebukes those Ephesians (specifically the women) because they are imitating how the prostitutes dress. They dress to entice men and the Ephesian women are starting to make these fashions as their standard. In Colossians 3:2 Paul says, Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

"…the world promotes the philosophy that beauty is physical and external, whereas the Word of God helps us to understand that beauty is fundamentally spiritual, and therefore, internal… The woman who adopts the world's philosophy, believes that her body is her identity. It becomes the basis for her security or insecurity. So you knock yourself out trying to achieve this beautiful model's figure, and that becomes the basis for your security." (Nancy Leigh DeMoss)

Don’t Waste Your Femininity With Ungodly Deeds

After Paul rebukes and reminds what are not supposed to be the passion and pursuit of a godly woman, he then tells what is appropriate for her – to adorn herself with good deeds. Good deeds will glorify God (Matthew 5:16) and they testify that those who do them are wise (James 3:13).

King Lemuel’s mother reminds him that an excellent wife or woman is far more precious than jewels and one of her characteristics is that she does him good all the days of her life (Proverbs 31:12). At verse 30, she exhorts that charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

You waste your femininity when you do not do good deeds. That is because you are not a woman living for this world’s approval; you are a woman living for the glory of God.

Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. (Matthew 5:16)

It is advised that you acquaint yourself with godly men and women whose aim is for the glory of God. And as I conclude, let me share some challenges and wisdom from godly people I respect:

"Does your hairstyle, clothing, or any aspect of your appearance reveal an excessive fascination with sinful cultural values? Are you preoccupied with looking like the latest American Idol winner, or the actresses on magazine covers, or the immodest woman next door? Are your role models the godly women of Scripture or the worldly women of our culture?" (C. J. Mahaney)

"The world's philosophy is if you want to be loved, you have to be beautiful, sensual and alluring. Now I grant that women who are sensual and physically stunning will likely receive a certain kind of male attention and love. But physical beauty will never get you the kind of love you were created for, the kind of love and attention that your heart as a child of God really longs to have. The Christian woman recognizes that she's already loved by God in a deeper and richer and more meaningful way than she could ever be loved by any human being. Therefore, our hearts as Christian women should fundamentally seek to be beautiful for God, i.e., to cultivate the kind of beauty that he finds attractive.

The world's perspective on clothing is driven by fashion. But the Christian's philosophy is driven by the heart and the Word of God. Now, let me ask which of those philosophies is revealed by your physical appearance and your clothing choices. What are you communicating? When people look at you, what do they learn about what you believe? Christian modesty is first and foremost a way of thinking. It's a way of thinking that manifests itself in the way that we dress, talk, and act. So ask yourself based on these two philosophies, "Am I living according to the world's way of thinking or am I reflecting God's heart and his way of thinking?" (Nancy Leigh DeMoss)

Don’t Waste Your C.I.

Christmas Institute or commonly known as CI is the most awaited event among the young people in The United Methodist Church. Who will want to miss this event wherein you’ll be having a 5-day camp with fellow brethren in Christ? As Methodist youths from different areas are given the chance to know Christ deeper, everyone is also sharpened by one’s faith and love.

Nonetheless, this significant event can be wasted. It can be enjoyably spent but not God-glorifying. It may be a time of knowing about God but not knowing God Himself. And worst, sometimes busyness for the CI work may deprive us of solitude and quiet moments with God.

I am attending the CI since 1997. And though I am not already part of the UMYF, this upcoming CI will be my 13^th time. My dear adings, I am praying that CI will not be wasted by you. I will mention three things that may help you not waste this CI.

GOD above all

UMYF’s motto is Christ Above All! Actually it is very familiar to you. But shouting Christ Above All is not just a motto; it is a lifestyle. It means God should always be the priority and the focus of your life. CI can be an avenue to be Christ-centered but attending the Bible studies, the lectures, the games, the devotions and other activities prepared by the EXECOM doesn’t mean that you are already Christ-centered. You may be there but the mind or the heart is not there, what’s the use? You may be attending but you are hunting for girls/boys and not seeking Christ. You may be listening about God but not interested to have a deeper relationship with Him. You may be singing praises but the heart is far away. You may be crying He is the Lover of your Soul yet the lifestyle denies Him the throne in your heart. May you never forget the most important commandment: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength (Mark 12:30).

Grab every opportunity in these five days that you have to know God deeper and to indeed love Him with all of you. He is the reason why you are attending the CI; do not waste it by emphasizing more of yourself.

The passion of the unwasted life is to joyfully display the supreme excellence of Christ by the way we live…The way we display the supreme worth of Jesus in our lives is by treasuring Christ above all things. (John Piper)

Others above you

Think about your co-campers more than yourself. We always tell campers from our church this principle: ‘Wag kang papayag na may mas mabait sa’yo. It does not mean that you should compete with others. It is an encouragement that you give your best for the welfare of others. CI is an opportunity to minister to others. And ministering to others is not just being BS facilitators or lecturers; you can do something for others. Words and conversations which are Bible-saturated are soul-edifying. Good actions will give God the glory. Jesus says let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven (Matthew 5:16). God-glorifying lifestyles will speak that Christ is your treasure. Do they see Christ as your treasure? Do you encourage them to treasure Christ as He ought to be treasured and magnified?

Grab every opportunity in these five days that you have to minister unto others. An author naming John MacArthur says that a person with deep conviction is not hunting for something to say. Rather, he is hunting for someone to say it to. Indeed, if you breathe for the glory of God, you will have every chance to display that there is little of yourself and much of Him in your life. Do not waste this CI by just focusing on what you want and what you enjoy and minding your own business and avoiding things that you think will deprive of your enjoyment. Rather, make this CI an avenue of self-denial by putting others above you.

You - His Beloved

Yes, this is now the time for you. You can enjoy this CI even by placing yourself last. Many people are deceived by pursuing happiness outside of Christ but if you want genuine happiness, then you should be drawing nearer to God, the Source of Perfect Happiness. When Jesus was asked by the teacher of the law which of all the commandment is the most important:

“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:29-31)

Where is self here? Is God concerned about our happiness or enjoyment? Yes. Love God and love your neighbor. Christ above all and you will find the only one who can quench the longings of the soul; the one who can soothe the aching heart. The joy of knowing and treasuring God is found the moment you learn to deny "self". The call of discipleship is an invitation to exchange fleeting and mundane niceties of this world for that which truly satisfies the human soul: intimacy with God. (John MacArthur)

Therefore, don’t waste this CI by prioritizing yourself than others. Don’t waste this CI by following your heart’s desire than obeying the will of God. Don’t waste this CI, my brothers and sisters.

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*This post is inspired by John Piper's book Don't Waste Your Life.

*Image is made by my brother Donnie.

Be Different

My last post here prayerfully challenges women to be different, not because we are women but because we are Christians. This post still shouts the same, BE DIFFERENT! And may it shout into our ears louder.

I lost the draft of a supposed blog post a month ago. I can’t remember the exact words anymore or the flow of my discussion there. Nonetheless, the incidence that brought me to write that supposed “blog post” keeps me unsettled. And I know I will be until I do something about it; at least through this blog.

That incident is this: It was my uncle’s funeral wake and relatives were gathered together. My sister uttered some words that made my heart sank into discouragement. She said that our cousin (who claims a believer of the Lord) now drinks beer with her unbelieving husband and an unbelieving cousin’s boyfriend. I was discouraged to hear that but was even more disappointed when she told us their justification; she told us that my cousin believes (and so is she) that there are pastors now who are “modernized”. And “modernization for them is believers and pastors drink (and so act) as the unbelievers do in order to reach them for the Gospel.

I know that this incident and this view is now rampant. Even in our church, a “church leader” and a Sunday School teacher even encourages carpenters renovating the church building to drink with him inside our church building. Yes, inside the church. And these people grieve me much. They do not know what damage/s they do for the body of Christ and what judgment from God they are storing for themselves. Where is the difference? Where is the new creation? Or should I ask the question Is there really a new creation?

That one reason why a church of God at this present moment has so little influence over the world is because the world has so much influence over the church. (C. H. Spurgeon)

The Bible tells us that if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! (II Corinthians 5:17). There are so many passages and so many reasons in the Bible why you should BE DIFFERENT. Let me just give four:

1. There is no in-between, no gray; just either light or darkness.

This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. (I John 1:5-6)

If indeed you are a new creation, you should BE DIFFERENT, different from how this world thinks, different from how it lives. Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did. (I John 2:6)

2. There is no shining crooked star.

So that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life. (Philippians 2:15-16a)

This passage is about doing without grumbling but take note children of God in a warped and crooked generation, you should shine like stars in the sky when you hold firmly to the word of life and do what it tells you to BE DIFFERENT and be blameless and pure. The Bible never tells us to be like this depraved world that you may shine like a star among them. It doesn’t and will not tell you to be like them so you could win them.

If indeed you are a new creation, you should be different, different from how this world thinks, different from how it lives. If you live in the light, you will shine like a star - not by walking in the darkness but by walking in the light. BE DIFFERENT!

3. There is no bad works that glorify God.

In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. (Matthew 5:16)

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. (Galatians 5:19-21a) Obviously those deeds are acts of the flesh and therefore won’t give glory to God. Why compromise and do the very things that will not honor God? And read the passage again, just in case it doesn’t strike you and take a look at my emphasis: let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Have you read that you have to be like them so they may become like you and thus, you and they give God the glory? Then why is the need to compromise and act as if God needs your strategy in soul-winning? And why contradict the Bible with your strategy?

If indeed you are a new creation, you should be different, different from how this world thinks, different from how it lives. If you live in the light, you will shine like a star - not by walking in the darkness but by walking in the light. And if you walk in the light, you will let your light (not their darkness) shine before others. These are deeds that mark you DIFFERENT.

4. There is no unholy child of the HOLY HOLY HOLY GOD.

Are you an obedient child of God?

As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. (I Peter 1:14) If you are a new creation, the old is gone. Peter tells you that you should not conform yourself again into that old you. Why?

But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.^" (I Peter 1:15-16, emphasis mine)

If indeed you are a new creation, you should be different, different from how this world thinks, different from how it lives. If you live in the light, you will shine like a star - not by walking in the darkness but by walking in the light. And if you walk in the light, you will let your light (not their darkness) shine before others. And you shine blamelessly because you just reflect what you are called to be - you are called to be holy because He who called you is HOLY HOLY HOLY. The world is not holy; so you should BE DIFFERENT!

My brethren, let me say, be like Christ at all times. Imitate him in "public." Most of us live in some sort of public capacity—many of us are called to work before our fellow-men every day. We are watched; our words are caught; our lives are examined—taken to pieces. The eagle-eyed, argus-eyed world observes everything we do, and sharp critics are upon us. Let us live the life of Christ in public. Let us take care that we exhibit our Master, and not ourselves—so that we can say, "It is no longer I that live, but Christ that lives in me." (Charles Spurgeon)

Redefining Beauty and Strength in a World That Redefined Them Already

Last Friday (October 29), I was able to attend a debut party of a friend. I was there as one of the 18 candles, meaning as one of those who would render a message for the debutant. I am not that acquainted with the debutant; in fact, I was surprised to know that I was on the list. The debutant is my best friend's niece and her mother was my first Vacation Bible School (VBS) teacher - both or either could be the reason why I was there. I knew what to say that time but I was grasping for a more personal message. So I started my speech about her mother and the unfading beauty I saw more than two decades ago. Yes, I may not know her that much but I am confident with the mother who raised her up.

After that, I can't help to think of how valuable are the roles of mothers (or even older women) in shaping their kids; moreover, in influencing young women's way of thinking in a "modernized"/feminized world. There are many views that corrupt the Biblical definition of a woman. If not for the guidance of a godly mother or a godly older woman, they may be embracing how women nowadays define beauty and display strength.

Beauty - an individually pleasing or beautiful quality; grace; charm (dictionary.com)

This is one of the most abused words among women. Beauty is measured by crowns, titles, admirers or even boys. But I Peter 3:3-4 says that your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. Do not desire the charm that the Scriptures say is deceptive nor the beauty that is vain (Proverbs 31:30). For more about this imperishable beauty, click here.

Jay Adams puts it this way:

A vital Christian, radiating that hidden beauty of the heart, is more attractive to the right sort of Christian man (the only kind you want) than the raving beauty who is hollow within. A woman who is developing her domestic abilities, who is reasonably attractive, and who is a vital Christian in her own right is an irresistible person.

Strength - the quality or state of being strong; bodily or muscular power; vigor (dictionary.com)

A woman defines strength when she is able to par if not to surpass that of men's. I received a text message which says that the LOUD VOICE of a man really shocks and threatens a woman...but, the SILENCE of a woman tremendously shakes the consciousness of a man.

However, Titus 2:3-5 says: Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God (emphasis mine).

Strength is not the ability to display the power over those viewed as superior than you, it is not the ability to control your situation or control a man. Strength is best displayed in domesticity. Carolyn Mahaney says that domesticity - devotion to the quality of home life - is an essential facet of femininity. Looking for some quotations about domesticity, I encountered this Harriet Spofford who says that if a woman is not fit to manage the internal matters of a house, she is fit for nothing, and should never be put in a house or over a house, any way.

This is the strength of Biblical women and the strength of the women of reformation (a term I learned referring to the wives/mothers of those men of reformation). Nancy Leigh DeMoss explains:

“In contrast to the wise woman, the foolish woman is not content to be a keeper at home. She is not satisfied with where God has put her. One of the things the feminist movement has done so successfully is to stir up discontent in women with being homemakers and to convince them that other pursuits can increase their sense of self-worth… Fueling discontent and pushing women out of their homes in search of greater meaning and satisfaction has resulted in off-the-chart stress levels for many women who can no longer survive without pills and therapists… The greatest spiritual, moral, and emotional protection a woman will ever experience is found when she is content to stay within her God-appointed sphere. This does not mean that she never leaves her house, but rather that her heart is rooted in her home and that she puts her family’s needs above all other interests and pursuits.”

Remember Martin Luther when he says that earth has nothing more tender than a woman’s heart when it is the abode of piety. What kind of woman are you? Are you one of those who struggle to show that you are one of the most beautiful women? Are you one of those who cry "girl power" and demand the exhibition of your greater ability than men's? Or are you a different woman?

The fact that I am a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian,but the fact that I am a Christian does make me a different kind of woman.

Those are words of Elisabeth Elliot. Are you a different woman?